First year of Grad School

So now that I've had a decent break from school (right before my summer class starts, haha), I thought I'd do a little reflection on my first year of grad school. 

In a lot of ways, it was what I had expected, but in some ways it wasn't. My first semester was far better than the second. I had an American Lit class and an editing class and enjoyed both of them. It got a little stressful at times, but I managed. And I got A's in both classes. I was proud of myself for accomplishing that in addition to the stress of moving back in October and adjusting to much, much longer days and a really long commute. It was exhausting. But I made it work. 

Second semester came around and I was a little nervous. I took poetry, which I was excited about, but I also had to take that dreaded research class and I had heard many, many terrible, horrible things about it. And it lived up to just about every one of them. It wasn't a particularly hard class, but it was extremely time consuming. Which meant for me that I spent all day Saturday and sometimes Sunday doing homework for just that class, plus occasionally making trips to the library during the week. 

That class was horrible and stressful and made me consider quitting a couple times. And, as it turns out (and as most people had warned), the class was pretty useless. Most of the people I heard that from were people doing a creative thesis. Which meant that the class was even more useless for me because the editing project I'm going to do is brand new so my teacher really didn't know what I should do or how to help me. That made it even more difficult for me to stay focused and put in all the effort I needed to in that class...why should I if it isn't helping me in any way? 

But, I did. I worked my butt off all semester--now not only did I have long days and a long commute, but my night classes were back to back (Wednesday/Thursday) which was even more exhausting, plus I had a puppy who really got a kick out of interrupting my homework time with all her shenanigans. 

In the end, I got A's in both classes. And I'm proud of myself. Toward the middle of last semester I had to really figure out what I'd be doing for my thesis. I went back and forth for a while between doing a creative thesis or doing the editing project, mainly because the editing project hadn't been approved yet, and I didn't want to get started on it only to find out I couldn't actually do it. 

Eventually it did get approved, so I decided to be the pioneer of the editing project. Seriously. I'm the only person currently in the program who is doing it. No pressure. So I have the book that I'll be editing. I've done a little research (which I had to do for that god awful class last semester--about the only thing that class was good for). Now I just need to actually start it. I'm having trouble motivating myself to do it though. After editing and stuff at work, it's hard to want to do all that work on my project later when I'm at home. 

Plus, my online class starts next week (I should probably figure that out for sure), and I'm working from home on Fridays. I'm guessing what I really need to do is just pick a specific time(s) each week to work on it. Part of me wants to wait until my class starts to see how much I'm going to need to do for that, but another part knows that if I do that, I'll just make more excuses not to get started on it. 

I have until Fall of next year to finish it though. And I know the longer I procrastinate, the worse it will be later and I'll have to become a hermit just to get it finished in time. Yikes. The good thing is that I'm not taking an actual class next summer. I'm taking my "thesis hours" so I get credit just for working on my thesis all summer. That should help a little. 

And I'd like to thank you all for taking time out of your days to read about all this nonsense. I do appreciate it! :) 

Copper loves her blankies :)

Grad School Crises

So I've had a few freak outs since starting grad school last semester. Although I think all of them have occurred this semester.

1. Trying to figure out what to do for my thesis. Not a terrible one, but it was stressful for a while.

2. Trying to figure out what to do for my thesis intro for my research class. I'm still not 100% sure what it is I'm doing, but I started it...and I'm still stressed.

3. Registering for my classes for next year. First, I thought my only other option besides the required Advanced Publishing class on Wed. nights was a Brit Lit. class offered by the same teacher who teaches the research class I'm currently in. So my schedule for next semester would have pretty much been identical to this semester. And I have never hated having two night classes in a row so much in my life. It sucks.
After I talked to my boss, she told me there were two classes offered during the day that I could take because neither interfered with her teaching schedule.
I want to take both.
The problem? They're only offered in the spring of odd years. So they aren't offered again until Spring 2015. Which leads me to number 4.

4. Far too many of the graduate courses are only offered every other year or whatever which makes it so hard to plan your schedule and makes it even more difficult to take classes you might actually enjoy for your electives.

5. I eventually made my decision based on whether I wanted to take a morning or afternoon class. And I went with the afternoon class.

6. Trying to figure out what I need to take to graduate and when I can possibly/hopefully graduate.
I'm still not 100% on this, but I'm signed up for a class to take this summer. Then I'll have two classes each semester next year, and an independent study that summer. I should only need one or two classes in the Fall of 2014 and then I can graduate! (I'm trying really hard to avoid staying until 2015 because I'd only need 1 class that spring semester.)

7. Aside from the constant worry/stress over homework assignments, tests, my thesis, and trying to make sure I have my schedule planned out correctly so that I meet all the requirements, I think that's about it. No pressure.

A Few Not-So-Important Research Findings

So, I actually learned a few things while I was doing homework for my Research Studies class. Crazy right?

1. I get a lot more work done in less than half the time when I don't have a puppy throwing toys in my face in an effort to get me to play with her.

2. Apparently people thought (some still do?) that Mary Todd Lincoln was insane and her son had her committed at one point. My non-expert opinion? PTSD.

3. Google is superior. I had to use Yahoo! Directory to search for one of the answers to a question (because my teacher hates Google and Wikipedia--even though I'm pretty sure that's how we all finished undergrad, but whatev). I eventually found a reliable, accurate, and current source. Out of curiosity, I decided to Google the question to see how easy that same site would be to find. It was the second search result. As opposed to the sixth or seventh on Yahoo! Out of even more curiosity, I decided to bing it, because I'm sick of seeing those stupid bing commercials where they do a blind comparison between it and Google (and they always choose bing!). Bing was as bad, if not worse than Yahoo! So those commercials are lying to you. Just fyi.

And in case you were wondering, I used the exact same phrase in all three searches. I suppose if you're not concerned with the credibility of your sources or with how up-to-date they are, then Yahoo! and bing are the way to go.

4. I don't like change. More specifically, I don't like changes to websites. Especially drastic ones. I went to a site that I used several times last semester, but it looked completely different. I began questioning if I was going to the right site in the first place (I double checked with my boss and I was). I'm all for updates and stuff, but doing a complete overhaul is just too much. For me at least. I had a hard time finding what I was looking for because I didn't know where to look.

5. Seriously, Google.

6. My Research Studies class homework is so much more enjoyable when it doesn't involve lugging around a gigantic book full of gibberish. (Okay, it's not gibberish--it's English. But it may as well be in a different language because it's confusing as shit.)

7. I made my boss laugh by telling her how my teacher always uses this excuse for making us learn to use that book: "What if the power goes out and you don't have internet access to do your research?" Um, I'm pretty sure that if my power goes out, the last thing I'm going to do is research. Even if I'm in the middle of doing research. Power's out? I'm done. Let's tell stories or something.

8. I hope my teacher can appreciate sarcastic answers to her questions. That's not really something I learned. Deal with it.

9. Cuties are not just for kids. Adults like them too! Those commercials piss me off. And if you're wondering what the hell that has to do with research, it doesn't. Except that I was eating one towards the end of my research assignment.

That was more than a "few." Oh well. You survived! And I survived another round of Research Studies soul-crushing!


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Gluten-Free

My stomach issues are not getting better. I have learned that the best way to deal with this is trial and error first--then go see the doctor. The last time I saw my doctor she said I might be lactose-intolerant. She said she wanted me to cut out ALL dairy for a month or so and see how I did. First of all, that was torture. I love milk and cheese and other dairy-based things. I hated soy milk. It was awful. I was just miserable. And to top it off, it made zero difference.

I'm thinking when I decide to go back to the doctor, A. I'm going to see a specialist rather than my regular doctor, and B. I'm going to be prepared. I've already tried cutting out dairy and that didn't work. The next possibility is gluten. Again, this pretty much sucks because it means no wheat. And I love bread. But I know if I were to go to the doctor tomorrow without trying it, that's what they'd tell me to do. No tests, no answers until I know for sure it isn't lactose or gluten that's causing me problems.

Luckily, there are a lot of foods that are gluten-free now, so that helps. I talked to my boss about it a few weeks ago and she told me she makes bread with some sort of rice flour and whatnot and she said she'd bring me some the next time she made it. She came in yesterday with a slice for me and it was delicious. Beyond my cooking skills? Probably. And I can't tell you exactly what's in it, but I do know she added poppyseeds and cranberries (and I topped it off with a little jam and butter).

Proof that not all gluten-free things will taste terrible. 

And now for the weekend recap:

I got almost all my homework done Saturday (or so I thought--I now have two days to finish the rest of my homework for my research class...grrr.). Chris came home and we had planned on going out for dinner and possibly trying a restaurant in downtown Farmington. After sitting on the couch for a while, we decided we'd prefer to just stay home. So he went to McDonald's and got us some dinner and a couple Sprites and we watched Saw. We also possibly watched Saw II that night. I can't remember. 

On Sunday, we did our usual routine--woke up, went to breakfast at the Factory Diner, went grocery shopping, and then came home to watch more Saw movies. I believe we watched Saw III-V. So we have another two or three to go. I don't know. Those movies are weird. But Chris likes them. And I make him watch Disney movies with me constantly, so I kinda owe him. 

 We also got Copper a nice big bone to chew on:

It apparently has a "real meat" center--that stuff stinks!

It's raining/snowing/sleeting/etc. I told Chris we should quit our jobs and move to a beach. His response? "I could just transfer to a store in Florida." Totally do-able. Except for the part where I asked him what I would do all day and he told me to take cooking classes--yeah right. 

First of all, I'm not a terrible cook. I just despise it with every bone in my body. And working full-time and going to school full-time makes me want to never ever cook. Seriously. I had ice cream for dinner last night because I didn't feel like making hamburger helper. And yes, I'm well aware that ice cream for dinner is probably not the best thing for my stomach, but let me remind you--I'm not lactose intolerant! :) 

Anyhoo. It's Tuesday. It's raining. I started my morning getting hit in the face with Copper's pea-soaked tail. Fun stuff. I imagine that's similar to parents who change their baby's diaper and the kid shoots pee in their face. It's hilarious when it doesn't happen to you. 

Have a good one everybody!

P.S. If you have any tips/recipes/whatever for eating gluten-free, I'd love to hear them! 

One Year Anniversary

A year ago today, I started my new big-girl job as Administrative and Editorial Assistant for Southeast Missouri State University Press. 

I can't believe it's been a year. What did I do on my first day a year ago? Left for Chicago for the AWP Conference. I had very little money--had to ask my parents for money to pay for my food while I was there--but I bought as many books as possible and got several signed by the authors. I still haven't read all of them yet, but I'm working on it.

It was my first time in Chicago--I loved it and hated it all at once. It was freaking February. It rained. It snowed. It was sunny and warm one day so we walked all the way to Navy Pier. It was painfully windy. And somewhere along the way, I lost my coat--go figure.

We got to see the premier of Being Flynn, which is based on the memoir Another Bullshit Night in Suck City by Nick Flynn (if you haven't read it, you should--it's fantastic...and how can you not want to read it with a title like that?!). I couldn't get my book signed by him because I had loaned it to a friend :( Getting to meet and talk with so many authors and other small presses was pretty awesome though.

A week later I was back in my apartment in Cape and learning my new job. I feel like it took a really long time to understand everything. And it took even longer to get things cleaned up and organized (the lady who worked here before me was not super organized, and by that, I mean not at all).

A year later and I still feel like there's a ton I don't know or understand and still have a lot to learn (which I guess is good in a way). And my office is not currently all that organized. Like most other "spaces" in my life, my office is an organized mess. Everything isn't neat and perfect, but I know where to find things (most of the time).

I started grad school last fall--being a full-time employee means I only have to pay for 30% of my tuition (as long as I pass). I was nervous last semester--worried about having enough time for work and classes and homework, etc. Last semester went pretty smoothly though.

This semester? Not so much. My research class is quite possibly the worst I've ever taken. I'm quite thankful that I only have one other class this semester (although only taking 2 classes a semester kind of kills me inside when I think about how much longer it will take to get my degree). I will be one of the happiest people in the world after finals are over in May (the other happiest people will be the other 15-20 people in my class).

Overall, it's been a good year. So much has changed since I started here. I moved twice. I went to Chicago twice. I bought a new car (all by myself the way grown-ups are supposed to). I've gotten to proof/edit several of our magazines and books. I had to take 4 sick days (which feels like a lot, but considering how much I used to get sick, that's a major improvement). I was kind of excited Monday morning because I felt good and realistically thought I could make it to today without getting sick, which would mean I would have only used 2 sick days (back in the fall when I had that awful UTI).

My stomach had other plans. You can read the full sick post here, but I was really, really upset when my boss sent me home. Partially because I had just thrown up and I'm a big baby and partially because I knew this meant at least 3 sick days in the year (which turned into my 4 total). And being sick means getting behind on work (she wouldn't let me take anything home to work on), behind on homework, behind on chores at home, etc.

I'm excited for this next year. We've got some really great books coming out this year (one that's almost ready to go to the printer!), I'll officially be finished with my first year of grad school (assuming I survive my research class), I'll be taking my first vacation in July, etc. Here's to another year!